So yes, I know I’m supposed to have posted yesterday, but something came up. That something was my little sister’s graduation. Her college graduation with her Bachelors degree. She is 19 years old. Yes, she is in fact super brilliant. And I totally started crying. Image

My Genius Little Sister

 

Why did I cry? Well I was crying because I was proud.I cried because I worked hard to help her get to this point too. I cried because she is just starting out on her life’s journey and right now she is just pure potential. But I also cried a little because I’m turning 31 this month and I still haven’t gotten my bachelor’s degree.

And that brings me to the point of this post (aside from bragging about my awesome sister of course). And that is Deadlines. Primarily the deadlines we set for ourselves in our heads. When I was 18 I had a plan for my life that included 4 quick years of college, a gap year to travel around the world, a masters degree and then a brilliant career in London or Paris or Rome paired with a handsome husband and maybe a few kids thrown in after we’d established ourselves. I look back on this now and laugh, and laugh, and laugh. When I stop laughing I try and figure out whether or not I’m really unhappy that the illusion I had of grown up life didn’t come true. 

The realities of my life at 31 are thus:

I do not have my bachelors degree

I do not have my masters degree

I live in Provo, not London

I do not have a husband, or children

But even taking all of these things into consideration I am still incredibly happy. I love my job. I have many good friends (including you guys!) that I met working where I do. I met and adopted my 6th sister because I chose a silly major. I love living near my family because we have so much fun doing things together. I have been to Europe 16 times and am going over for my 17th next month. I have a handsome gentleman caller who makes me laugh, and if I hadn’t stuck around here that never would have happened. So even though I haven’t met all the expectations or the deadlines set by my 18 year old self, I honestly wouldn’t want to go back and live the life that I had planned out for myself. Still I continue to set deadlines for myself and then have to restructure my plans. I’m still working on that degree, I’m still thinking about kids one day, and even though I’m not sure I want to live in London anymore I still try and keep my mind and my options open to the new opportunities that life may bring me tomorrow. And yes, occasionally I mourn a little bit for the silly hopes and dreams and naive stupidity of my younger self. But I’ll try to live by the advice I’ll give my little sister. Life never turns out how you plan it, but if you are open to it’s possibilities it can turn out even better than you could have ever imagined. And for that, I’m truly grateful. 

 

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